Music

I'm sitting here waiting on my husband to get home from work so we can go finish our Christmas shopping....listening to music.  Up until college I really didn't listen to much music other than Contemporary Christian music and what we were playing in band.  After meeting two of my best friends in college (Amy and Dwayne) and my future husband (Matt), I realized how moving and life changing music can be.  They all had such a huge passion for music and words that I was left speechless by their conversations about it...both because I had no idea who they were talking about and because I was amazed by their enthusiasm and love for it.  I began to figure out what I liked and didn't like, and realized that maybe secular music wasn't of the devil.  LOL.  Music speaks to me more than a sermon, more than an inspirational speaker, more than a class.  I am so thankful that I made friends who encouraged me to explore what I liked and that I had the courage to do it.  It's one of the things I want to pass on to my kids early and hope that they can experience it much earlier than I did.

Evil

As most of my friends know, I am against the Death Penalty....at least for the last 10 years or so. Today really tested that belief, although I still stand by it. I am just beginning to understand how someone can be and remain a victim of domestic violence. I've always thought....I would just leave or how can someone allow someone else to constantly do this to them....always admitting that there's really no way I could know since I've never been in that situation. What I should be asking myself is...how can someone beat a human being when there is nothing to provoke it. What inside of them makes them do it and could they stop it if they really wanted to? If I were in a situation where I was being abused, where I had children and no family, where I was told if I whispered a word I would be killed or my children would be killed, where I was locked up with no phone or internet, where every move I made was watched and filed away in someone's sick brain, where I couldn't think past how to get through today much less where I could run to if I left, what would I do?

I used to say there was no way I would stay...that I would report the Bastard and move on with my life. Now I realize it's not that easy. Some of the most calculating, controlling, manipulative people you will ever meet are perpetrators of domestic violence. Would I take a chance that they would act on their threat of killing my children? I don't know. Would I take a chance of calling the police and them not doing a damn thing, only to make the perpetrator more angry? I don't know. Would I file charges if I did get away and have to repeatedly come face to face with them in court? I don't know. 

I do NOT believe in the death penalty because there are too many cases of innocent people being executed. Even with DNA testing, new cases are not always 100%. Unfortunately, we have to be cut and dry on these issues. Otherwise, who decides? Is it ok to execute everyone on death row, even if there is not 100% proof of guilt, and call it "friendly fire"? We know some of them are guilty so we have to take our chances with the rest for the common good?.? I don't think so. Would I think the same way if someone raped MY little girl? I don't know. I pray I'll never have to find out.

Write

I've been thinking about starting a blog for a long time so that I could have a place to write my thoughts. So, I'm going to give this a try. If you follow my blog, please don't take offense at what I say or try to change it. I change my mind all the time all by myself. You can give your opinion if you'd like, but I will NOT argue with you. If I choose not to reply to a comment, it's not because you've stumped me. I'll admit when that happens. Hopefully, this allows me to work through some of my own questions. I think that putting what you believe in writing is one of the hardest things to do and I encourage everyone to try it themselves.